John 18 | Denial and Hope
December 20th, John 18
Chapter 18 of this Gospel is where, if you did'n’t know the ending of the story, your blood pressure would start to rise. Here is the promised Messiah, the one who is to save and redeem and heal and reclaim all that’s gone wrong. And He’s getting arrested? It looks like they are going to kill him?
And then we read something that is both very sad and very hopeful, I think.
“Peter was standing and warming himself. So they said to him, “You also are not one of his disciples, are you?” He denied it and said, “I am not”.
-John 18:25
This will repeat itself two more times, Peter will deny having any relationship with Jesus.
Denial
Consider the gravity of this. What would you think if the pastor you look up to, a devoted Christian said “I don’t know Him!” What stinging words… In another one of the Gospels it says that after this, Jesus looked over at Peter and then Peter went away and wept bitterly. (Luke 22:62)
Have you ever felt that pain? Of spending time with Jesus. Of seeing Him do great things? Of knowing the warmth of His presence… and then before you even know it. You deny Him? How can we walk with Jesus so closely and yet still find within ourselves such sin?
If you are aware, you see this within yourself. Your propensity to turn your back on Him, it’s within us all. I don’t write as someone who has never wept bitterly over my sin as a Christian before. I have faced some dark nights and this story of Peter has given me so much hope.
Hope
Hope that God isn’t finished with those of us who fail. Hope that His love is greater than sin. Hope that we can cultivate through God the power to kill our sins. Hope that in the darkest of bitter weeping, Christ is dying on the cross for me. Christ died so that Peter’s denial would not separate Him from the love of God. Christ died for the sins I commit when I turn my back on God and spit in his face, so that I am define by Christ, not sin.
If you find within yourself sin this holiday season, take heart. Remember all w’eve learned in John. Jesus didn’t come to condemn the world, but save them. (John 3) Jesus loves sinners and draws near to them (Luke 8). Jesus prays for us that we would make it to the end and that we would know the Father’s love for us. (John 17)
There is hope, if we look to Christ. None of this is an excuse to make sin a small thing or not treat it seriously. No, it makes us treat it all with more rigor and seriousness! For sin is no small thing. But it does give us hope. Hope that we are not beyond saving, Peter is that example for us.
Something that I’ve been reminded of that has been so helpful. For every look you take at your sin, take ten looks at Christ. Christmas is about hope because Christmas is about Jesus. There is hope for the deepest sins we’ve committed. May we bring them into the light, confess, repent, and get back up again. Looking to the cross and to Christ, for we are saved and loved despite our sins, because of Jesus’ death.
All I know to say is, look to Christ. Don’t look to me, don’t look to some awesome pastor. Don’t look to a mature Christian for what only Jesus can do for you. Look and look and look and behold and admire and ask for eyes to see the love that kept him hanging there. He could have stopped it at anytime, but he endured out of love for us. May this lead us to greater holiness, not less.
Reflection Question
None of us are beyond sin. I found a sin within myself this week that I confessed to one of my friends, repented, brought it into the light and am trying to take it seriously. It’s not pretty. It’s not fun. But it’s always worth it. Sin thrives in the dark.
Consider reading this article, four things to do after you sin, if you feel hopeless. Pick one that you will work on today.
Thankful for grace and taking sin seriously,
Josh.