I Was Stirred This Morning
I always want to be honest and realistic about my own relationship with God. Some days feel very mundane. Sometimes they don’t feel particularly spiritual. My connection with God doesn’t always stir my heart up. Sometimes reading the Bible feels nothing more than a chore, even though we should stay in it.
Convictions
I felt convicted of how much time I spent on youtube and games yesterday, and asked God last night to help me use my time better. This isn’t a bad conviction, but it struck me as more annoying than Godly because not all of my days look like that. Of all the things I’ve been praying about, what I felt most in my heart was conviction last night. What are you doing God?
This morning, when I woke up I decided to pick up a theological book and read some to start my day well. Was it because I wanted to meet God? Or because I wanted to simply not feel convicted anymore? I don’t know.
I picked up John Piper’s Fifty Reasons Jesus Came To Die.
I can’t explain it. I don’t know why this particular morning the Spirit moved in my heart. But my affections for who Jesus is, the fact that He wanted to die for me, and the love of His heart become more real to me. I found myself thanking Jesus. I found myself more aware of how bloody the cross was. I marveled at the cost that Jesus paid for me.
Purpose in Conviction
It made me want to follow Him more deeply, in greater obedience. If He would die for me, why would I not trust Him in the waiting? Why would I not seek to be more obedient to His voice? Why would I not walk more closely with Him each day?
Did God convict me last night so that I would pick up that book today? That in the calm and peace of the morning I would be met by God?
Forgotten Prayers
While writing this article I’m reminded of a prayer I prayed a few days ago: “God, do whatever you must do in my life to keep me faithful.” Was this the answer to that prayer?
God, stir our affections for you. And then help us put ourselves in places for you to do just that. We may forget our daily prayers, but God doesn’t.
Thankful for Jesus dying for me,
Josh.